Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Tigers

Well with Dick on paternity leave I thought I'd better step up to the plate. Firstly why aren't the Saints playing the Demons on Good Friday? Perfect opportunity to have a crucifixion as the pre match entertainment. Can you imagine St Nick nailing the drunken Dee Maloney to the cross (Maloney honorary member of Punchdrunk and more on him later).  And if it's good enough for them to play the other game in Rome on this most holy of days why not at the other cathedral - the MCG?

Easy answer of course - it's because Hitler, I mean Stalin, I mean Idi Amin, I mean Colonel Gadaffi (although he might melt), I mean George Speight (very bad example), I mean Saddam, NO I REALLY MEAN DEMETRIOU down at the Awful Football League doesn't want it.


When is the UN going to realise that we want rid of this dictator? They could organise an attack on his Jolimont compound or just do what Mossad did - find, drug, blind fold, offer 2 choices, and fly him to Nuremberg for trial, which is very efficient. They could also come to a deal with him and find a country of refuge to take him (watch out for the 747 full of gold flying out with his Mrs the day before though).

Enough of that drivel though.

Now I'm a Tiger and I'm celebrating a rare victory this weekend even though it was only over the shin boners. My father in law and brother in law are shin boners and I have copped a lot of texts etc about the man boy with neck tatts free kick in the last minutes. I've told them with all due respect (which means none) to go and get absolutely stuffed. The poor shiiiiiiin bonerrrrrs being ripped off again. The world owes the shiiiiin bonerrrrrrs something according to them. Get a life and go to the games I say. There was more Tigers at Etihad for their home game than Roos.

It also goes in swing and round abouts - look at the kick against McGuane in the Tigers/Saints game which even the Awful Football League in a rare moment of honesty said was incorrect. At any rate the there was no guarantee that the shiiiiiiiin bonerrrrrrs would have won if that kick hadn't been paid, and the same goes for the Tigers against the saints.


Don't their supporters know that they're going broke? Evidently they don't because only about 3 supporters turn up. Junior Eddie (Jaaayyy Beeeee) and his board have filled the joint full of debt with just about no way of paying it back if they don't turn up - that is of course without moving to Ballerat, Hobart, Tiwi Islands, Tripoli or anywhere that'll take them.

Anyway the Tiges had a win and now inevitably are talking finals. Talk about getting ahead of themselves. They've beaten 1 team and they're currently bottom of the ladder. Hard to not get excited by Martin, Cotchin, Delidio, Reiewoldt et al though.

The other games played so far this weekend:-

Saints v Brisbane - boring
Purple Haze v Bulldogs - bulldogs are flat track bullies
Gold Coast v Power - Power are pathetic and the shiiiiin boneeeeers will notch up their first win next weekend.
Pies v Bombers - I, as a good Tiger abhor both these teams, but hard to see any other team beating the pies. Bombers have been good but compared to last year they're not far higher up the ladder so it remains to be seen.

One last word on Maloney. He might not be welcome in the leadership group at the Dees but he's welcome at Punchdrunk as far as I'm concerned. After all, all he did was get blind, piss on a bar and get asked to leave a pub. That's practically all my friends.

Also congrats to Dick and Sharee on new Dee in the world Arlo, and congrats to Megan & I on the new Tiger Howard.

Now really enough of that drivel.


Hopefully I haven't offended too many majorities, minorities, shiiiiin boneeeeeer

3 comments:

  1. Welcome to the Drunk airwaves Dickwad. Love a good rant....
    I share your pity and despair at that kangaroo road-kill mob, as I've posted previously, they're Bombers wannabes, and really, who'd wanna be one of those??
    I too would gladly sign a warrant for collection and removal of Vlad, he behaves more like Mugabe every day.
    I want to make it clear that Beamer Moloney DIDN'T piss on the bar, that was unjust unfounded and untrue media sensationalism. He may have tried and missed however...
    Welcome to your week-old Tiger cub Howard Jack Reiwoldt Wade, and glad he has a 100% victory strike rate thus far.

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  2. If pissing on a bar was a crime, then how did the mighty blue bags win all those flags in the 70's and 80's? ...other than pinching a few lads from WA, SA etc, and then there was the brown paper bags... I'll stop while I'm ahead... anyway, swap you Broc Mclean for moloney????

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  3. No mate, you can keep Brock, the Hawks can definitely keep Bruce, the Tiges are welcome to Brad Miller.
    Now who can we offload the rest of our useless taem to?

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